My spiritual journey has always felt like I move forward in centimeters rather than miles. I’ve read books about people who fall and hit their head or something just clicks for them and suddenly they are in bliss and they spend their lives teaching others how to get to bliss. I’ve never had that bump on the head. I really work at putting light into my being every day and use a patchwork of prayers and visualizations that I have composed over my life whenever I feel I am being pulled off my path, which is sometimes every ten minutes (ha ha). The necessity for my perseverance all made sense when I read a book by a fantastic medium, Michael Reccia, who is the author of the Joseph Communications. In short, there is a consciousness out there that doesn’t want anyone to elevate out of anger, self-loathing, addiction, despair, etc. because it needs us to keep feeling those things so it can feed on our emotions. He explains all about how the consciousness was created. It’s fascinating and I highly recommend reading his books, but it put into place everything that I had felt and experienced every time I brought more love and light into my life.
I’ve struggled with addiction since I was a young teenager.
I am a “sensitive” who didn’t want to be a sensitive and used any means I could to escape the things I saw and felt. It was so hard to break that pattern. In my adult life, I used alcohol to escape. I never had blackouts or was belligerent, but I knew alcohol was holding me back from my true purpose. When I found the Medical Medium and he talked about some of the physical elements around addiction, I used his protocols to help me break out of it.
I remember the day I made a soul-deep shift and decided not to drink anymore.
That night, I woke up around 3:00 AM, needing to go to the bathroom, and as I walked through my living room to get to the bathroom I felt an extremely dark and strong presence in my living room glaring at me. I somehow knew it had come because of this shift I had made. I also knew that it was immobilized in the center of the room for some reason. It looked like a giant black mass of smoke. It made the entire area around the living room feel cold. That first night, I sent a huge blast of light its way, which pushed it out of the house, but I could still feel it outside. The next night, when I got up around 3:00 AM to go the bathroom, there it was again in the living room, but this time I just left it alone. I knew it was still immobilized where it was. Then the next night, same deal, there it was, emanating its hatred and loathing for me. Then on the fourth night, it was gone and has never come back since then. I knew it was trying to find a way to pull me back in, but there was nothing left for it to pull, so it just kept watch until it gave up. I realized what a huge spiritual shift I had made for something so dark to show up. I also knew that anyone dealing with letting go of self-destructive patterns would probably get a similar visit, whether they could see it or not.
The next huge shift I made was about letting go of fear about exposing my gifts to others.
I was a teacher and I had information that could help others, but I was always too afraid of judgment to share the full extent what I knew. This shift came about when I was laying in bed one night in a hotel in North Carolina. I was reading one of the Joseph Communication books, when I felt more light than I have ever known flood my body. Even the room seemed to get lighter and I felt another soul-deep shift and it was a shift in orientation.
I felt all the way down to my core that helping others was more important than my fear of judgment.
When I got back home, I started my teaching series on YouTube. After the first video went out, I went from jogging every morning and feeling great to feeling so drained that I could not move. I felt like a cloud of darkness had surrounded me. I prayed and fought hard. It took me three days to clear it away from me. Then I got bit twice in a span of another three days by venomous spiders while I slept, which has never happened before in my life. The first bite swelled to the size of a lemon and the second swelled to the size of a grapefruit. After the first bite, I pulled my bedroom apart, trying to find the culprit, but could find nothing. When the second bite happened, I was at a loss. I prayed to the Angel of Light to protect me. (She is one of the angels that the Medical Medium talks about in his first book.) I haven’t been bitten since, but I am still dealing with dark clouds. They aren’t draining me anymore. They just have a dampening effect on my ability to channel the information that I put in my videos. I just spend time clearing it whenever it shows up.
The reason I wanted to share these experiences with you is that it’s important to be aware that there is a consciousness out there hedging its bets against your success, so don’t be hard on yourself if you’re struggling.
Find that compassion for yourself because compassion allows you to work for yourself and others. When you are working against yourself, the darkness has an “in” and it will be much more difficult to progress. Give yourself a big hug and thank yourself for all your efforts. Darkness loves it when you are distracted from your light, whether that be through addiction, anger, jealousy, or anything that suppresses the light in your heart. All you need to do to clear darkness is acknowledge how it was affecting you and choose a different path. That’s it! You’re that powerful! You can also ask for help from the angels the Medical Medium talks about in his first book. (He gives their names, and instructs to ask for help out loud because the angels have an easier time tagging your request as a genuine prayer if you say it out loud. There is so much going on down here that they can’t spend all their time reading our thoughts to find the prayers intertwined in them.) There are also millions of exercises out there that can help you visualize clearing darkness, and they work if you believe they work.
I wish you all every blessing on your journeys.